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Bullying

Today when most of us wake up in the morning, before we even brush our teeth, we wake up our computers and quickly click through a routine of email, then Facebook, twitter, and any other social networking site we may be using. From there, whether we spend the day in school, university classes, or work, we are never unreachable.  Even our phones have brought almost every aspect of our web-lives right into our pockets.   And for the most part this has been a good thing, not only helping us keep in touch with friends and family, but also providing a non-stop feeling of connection.

Unfortunately, as with all good things, there is an evil that balances it out.  Because we rely so much on technology, the days of playground bullying have been replaced by cyber bullying, which does not stop when the last bell rings.  Cyber bullying has become a huge issue among people of all ages, all over the world.  And because of the ability to remain anonymous, people who would not usually bully in person now feel comfortable bullying anonymously through cyber space where they don’t have to deal with the consequences. 

Recently the issue of cyber bullying has been making headlines in news papers and online news sources all over the world, for very negative reasons.  In January the full effects of how horrible bullying can be were seen in Massachusetts, USA.  A fifteen year old girl, Phoebe Prince, took her own life after being tormented and teased for months.  Can you imagine being so cruel and hurtful to someone that it would make them want to take their life?  Bullying can hurt anyone, even if it is hurtful name calling and not physical pain.  

Bullying, in all of its forms, is an issue that is increasingly gaining awareness, but still goes on.  There has got to be some way to stop it, or at least ways to help the victims either cope with or make the bullying end. There is never going to be a “no-bullies allowed” rule on Facebook or MySpace, so we are the only ones who have the power to make a difference, and help put an end to bullying. 

What are some things we can do as individuals, and as a the larger group of young people, both in Australia and around the world, to help raise awareness of bullying?  What can we do to make those victims of bullying know that they are not alone?  

What do you think about bullying and cyber bullying? Have you experienced it and overcome it?  Do you know someone who was able to stop bullying in their life?  Do you know anyone who is a bully, and if so why do you think they are?

For more information on bullying and cyber bullying, check out the fact sheets and stories on ReachOut.com.

Resources:

http://au.reachout.com/find/issues/school-uni-tafe/bullying 

http://www.bullyonline.org

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/04/09/us/09bully.html?scp=4&sq=phoebe%20prince&st=cse

 

 

Tags:
bullying
cyberbullying

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16 Comments

Roisin - RO Crew

over 1 year ago

Reply Report

Hi Bullying Sux!

I am sorry to hear about everything you have been through.  Everyone deserves to live in an enviroment free from Buling and harrasment and no one ever ask or desrves to be bullied, ever!

You have done the right thing by letting your parents and principal know about what is going on and it's great to hear that they have been so supportive.  I also wanted to say well done to you for standing up to your bullies.  This is not an easy thing to do and really shows how stong and brave you are:)

Reach Out has lots of information and tips for dealing with bullys that you may find helpfull.  Here are the links: http://au.reachout.com/find/articles/bullying-what-to-do-if-you-are-being-bullied

http://au.reachout.com/find/articles/bullying-what-it-is

Remeber if you ever feel like talking to someone about anything you are going through Kids help line are super freindly.  You can reach them on 1800 55 1800 anytime of the night or day :)

All the best
Roisin - RO Crew

Bullying_Suxs!

over 1 year ago

Reply Report

Hi! i have been bullied all through primary and now im in high school and its still happening im ova it its not fair in primary school i used to get bullied because of how big my teeth were then i thought if i moved schools it would be better but the same thing happened the last school i went to was awesome didn't get bullied once ! but then i camt to high school didnt i anf it all started again it all started with this girl in my class she calls me Bugs Bunny , Buck-toothed idiot and all this and the other day someone called her a p*******e and she thought it was me and she even hopped on my bus and followed me to the station where she stopped me froom getting on my train i had to barge throught he to get to my train then she threatened me and said dont come to school next monday if you know whats good for you i went straight to my mum and she went to the prinicpal that girl got in trouble then today these 2 other girls in my class have been bullying me because my friend found lice in my hair and they were calling me ferral and sayingi shouldnt be at school and they said they dont wanna be my friend anymore because i have nits i went to the pricnicpal again but this time i handed in notes that they wrote it on and handed it in nothing has happened yet but the principal of the school im at is going to talk to them tommorow and she said dont worry they will be in trouble in the end i got sick of it and  i went right up to them and i said Get A life so what if i have lice im sure you have had it before so get ova yourself and grow up and then i walked away im sick of getting bullied i dont know what to do to make them stop do u guyz have any ideas if so plz let me know :) thnxs :)

K8E

over 1 year ago

Reply Report

All I have to say is it gets better.. In a few years if your going through this stuff at school now, u will be out of there and away from those people making your life a living h*ll.. U will be able to hang out with the people u want and be yourself and do whatever u want.... I went through school and now I'm in my 3rd yr of TAFE doing my diploma in welfare.. I'm getting help with social phobia which I've had for most of my life, through firstly going to my GP and asking for a referal to a psychologist, the psychologist then started me on CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy). Taking this step has helped me sooooo much.. so if your having issues with anxiety, depression, need someone to talk to or just feeling a bit sh*t go see your school councillor or GP to see what they have to say. Any contact u have with these professionals is confidential except if they think you are going to harm yourself or someone else then someone may need to be notified.. And you get 6 free psychologist visits through medicare in NSW(not really sure about other states) how kewl is that.WOW....

Hope this stuff helps someone..

+Kt+

quietlittlenoone

over 1 year ago

Reply Report

Since i can remember i have been bullied, and still to this day i do may i just say to anyone who reads this PLEASE FOR GODS SAKE DON'T CALL RED HEADS RANGA'S UNLESS THEY SAY THEY DON'T MIND IT PLEASE DONT!!!!! but I'm also made fun of because i'm a nerd i c the school counsellor and my year co-ordinator everyday asks me how am i and i missing out on 1 class each day because he is scarred that i will suicide or self harm which i have thought about the last 6yrs, and yet becuase i'm the younger sibiling my parents are totally unaware of my life they are so obsessed with my older brother. so with little in my life i'm frustrated when some doctor say that BULLING IS GOOD!!!!! they should understand what most of us have been through....

Roisin - RO Crew

over 1 year ago

Reply Report

@ Claira and Libby, Thank you guys so much for sharing your inspiring stories of how you have dealt with bullying in the past.  You are both so brave and I'm sure you're stories will inspire others :)

LoveIsPainAtItsBest

over 1 year ago

Reply Report

I've never been the type of girl to be bullied. Not that there is a type, but im always nice to everyone and never try to purposely hurt or make someone upset. Of course I may accidently, and i apologize, but hey we are only young :) I always used to be the kid who was friends with everyone, in primary school i was like that, then I moved to Australia from England, and I was still somewhat friends with everyone, just not close friends. But i never had been attacked in any way by someone, High school of course is different, im on my third year, and of course im not friends with everyone, yet im still nice to people. Then i start getting abuse over the internet. From people I don't know, or they hide who they are (on this question site, a new one, it is pretty much a bully site now formspring may have heard of it?) and im even nice to them, i try to speak it out nicely and maturely and im usually calm and patient. But this recent one, they were just being petty and repeating themselves over and over saying the same things, and it was over my blog! my blog, they didnt even know me but they were calling me these really harsh names which i certainly am not. So after a few days of just constantly recieving this abuse, I decided hey I have put up with it i have tried to be nice to this person but they obviously don't deserve it. So i had this massive rant at them, listing the stupid and immature things they are doing, it was basically an essay and i havent recieved one abusive message from them again since :)
Bullying doesnt usually bother me when it is someone I don't know, it is when i know someone, and they are saying stuff or acting a certain way, because they know me and know what i look like etc etc, but these internet people dont. But any sort of conflict or negativity gets to me, and i guess i can admit im shallow enough to care of what people think of me. So having never really being bullied, to having all these abusive comments and stuff, sort of got to me. I dont believe anyone has the right to make someone feel worthless, or like they should feel bad about themselves. They have no right to assume anything, especially when they don't know you or what you have been through or not. Abusing and bullying is pointless in my eyes anyway, I know we are young and everyone at one point does it somewhat to a point, but it is no excuse :) I believe so :D

-Libby

Claira

over 1 year ago

Reply Report

I am a 16 year old student at Streaky Bay Area School on the west coast of South Australia. I am currently studying the year 12 Research Project, a compulsory part of the new SACE. My project is based on Bullying and how students can protect themselves and their peers. I have been (and am still currently) a victim of bullying. I have experienced all sorts of bullying, from sexual assult to name calling and stares. I recently took part in the MAKE POVERTY HISTORY ROADTRIP I beleive that this program was very effective in getting the word out about global poverty, why won't we do the same for Bullying? It would get heaps of people involved. It would also show people that we are doing something to help those who are being bullied. Because there is such a large spectrum of bulling it is hard to say that there is a set way to stop or deal with bullying. I have found that the way that I overcame the assult that I experienced and all the other bullying taht I have experienced in the past (and earlier today) is to forgive, I am not saying that what people do is right but if you say that you don't want to know about it anymore than forgive people and you can move on with your life, schooling, job or whatever you are doing.I know lots of bullies but at the same time, we can all be bullies, I'm not saying that it is right but we need to try to correct our own behavior before we rty and tell someone else taht what they are doing is wrong.

xx
:)

Ophelia.L

over 1 year ago

Reply Report

Hi Roisin,


Thanks - I sometimes don't know whether to feel sorry for bullies. I mean at the end of the day they have a bad day & we have a bad day ourselves! There be no point in being at each others throat & harrassing or threatening anyone. It's best if they go their own way & we go our own way.

And I'll be honest with you this may sound bitchy, but I hope not - no one can protect victims from bullies, only themselves, because if you are going to send someone else to do the talking & the 'standing up' for you, well - that's just to show they will still bully you, unless 'the person who is being bullied' puts a stop to it.

But definitely speaking to someone about it, is a good idea & a safe way, like a teacher, parent, or the parent of the person who is bullying you. I just hope I wont put anyone's head through a locker, but I'm old enough to realise it's wrong.

Roisin - RO Crew

over 1 year ago

Reply Report

Hi Taylie,

Welcome to Reach Out :)

There is nothing wrong with being a bit shy but if you are being bullied you do need to do something about it because bullying is never ok.

I have found some links to some fact sheets that may be helpful to you, so I hope you will have a read :)

This one is about being shy and how to overcome your shyness when you need to:
http://au.reachout.com/find/articles/shyness

This fact shee is about bulling and explains why people bully and how to deal with them:
http://au.reachout.com/find/articles/bullying-what-it-is

This fact sheet has some more practical advice on how to stop bullys:
http://au.reachout.com/find/articles/bullying-what-to-do-if-you-are-being-bullied

Please remember if you are being bullied it is not your fault and there is nothing wrong with you. Don't be afraid to let someone know that you are being bullied as they may be able to help you.

If you feel like talking to someone about anything you are going through remeber you can call Kids Help Line on 1800 55 1800 or Lifeline on 13 11 14.  They are really freindly and you can call anytime 24/7.

Take Care
Roisin -RO Crew

Roisin - RO Crew

over 1 year ago

Reply Report

Hey there Courtney the Cop,

I am sorry to hear that you were bullied and I think you are dead right. People often bully other people because they feel insecure or have low self esteem so bulling people makes them feel more powerful.

Its awesome to hear that you are begining to find out who you are again and now feel able to stand up for yourself.  This can be really hard to do so you should be really proud of yourself :)

We have some more info on bullying and how to deal with it here: http://au.reachout.com/find/articles/bullying-what-it-is

Remember if you feel like talking to someone about every thing you have been through you can call Kids Help Line on 1800 55 1800 or Lifeline on 13 11 14.  They are really friendly and there to listen :)

Take Care
Roisin - RO Crew

Roisin - RO Crew

over 1 year ago

Reply Report

Hi Olliie,

Thanks for sharing your story of how you dealt with your bully and well done to you for standing up for yourself. :)

Ophelia.L

over 1 year ago

Reply Report

Hi (?)


I think you gotta break the rules & let yourself feel what you want to be. Being shy is a part of you, but do you want to be shy still? :)

It's up to you to know when you want to stop being shy & stand up for yo'self. :) 

If you are ready now - than you aced it...
If not - than you can practice letting go. ;)

Taylie

over 1 year ago

Reply Report

Does anyone have an answer to stopp being shy and stand up..?

Ophelia.L

almost 2 years ago

Reply Report

People will only get bullied, if they don't put an end to it.


If you want bullying to stop - you gotta be strong & stand up for yourself. No one should be victims nor silent about their feelings. Bullying sucks! Badly!

It's hard to stand up for yourself, but when you do it - you'll find this sense of relief inside you and you will be amazed. :)

Courtney The Cop

almost 2 years ago

Reply Report

i believe that bulying begins when someone is unsure, insecure and worried about themselves or their self image and they just want attention. it can happen to anyone

I was bullied all my life. i was the 'outsider' the 'crazy one' but that is just me.

my bullying and tormenting began when i was only 6. i didnt have many friends and everyone teased me about the shoes i wore. it was then that the bulyig became its worse. I was about 10 and had been friends with the 'new boy' since year 1. He was geting teased about not wanting to play a 'man sport' he instead wanted to play hockey. They called him names, sent threat notes and prank called his home number just to abuse him. it was one day that i decided i hated seeing my friend so sad. i decided to stick up for him. i called the buulies names, i swore at them and i began to get violent when they got violent at me. i kept going, even when i was the one who was shouted abuse.
My best friend and i were seperated through highschool, he went away to a private school and i went to the public school in a town not too far from home. i was bullied there too, online, on my phone and face to face. i stopped being the person i was, an individual, creative, funny person with a strong sence of indiviuality. It got worse to an extent that i self harmed and began to 'wag' school. i also began self harming because my best friend 3was being bullied and he had begun to self harm also. I was then sent to a private girls school and the bulying subsided but still remained.
I have only just got the courage back to stand up for myself and fight back. i have had to change my monile number 4 times now due to girls getting my number and abusing me.i have recently lost my 'big brother' a guy i have known since forever, he refuses to talk to me because i am 'different'

no one really understands what its like to be bullied until you lose a friend or your friends become lost and begin doing stupid things. i still have trouble meeting poeple becase i lie about who i am so they will like me. even now cyber bullying has become so extreme that everyone is the target, no matter how beautful, popular, smart and inocent you are, you will get bullied because of something. its everywhere, somewhere and no-where.   

Ophelia.L

almost 2 years ago

Reply Report

I dont want to answer the questions, but I want to share my story.


In high school, I was bullied. Actually, even in primary school. No wonder I self harmed. I have so much issues. Anywhozit...I'm an adult (23) and will share how I overcame bullying.

In high school, this girl pushed me to the ground. I set the record straight. No fight or anything. I just warned her: 'back off or you will get hurt.' Friendly advice. No threat. Actually I put her head through the lockers. I had anger issues back than. Meh! Anywhozit!

Another bully: I delete someone from SN*, because I was upset at a comment made on there about me. She knew I have feelings for someone else & she said something hurtful. It got overwhelming & I deleted her. I receive a message telling me, whatever blah blah blah - you need help. You are weird or something like that, but it was abusive. She apologised & made amends. I forgave her.

The second time, my life was 'falling to pieces', so I deactivated my acct, which doesn't mean I delete one person. She sends me an abusive & threatening message that I should go kill yourself, I have multiple personality disorder, should sign myself in a mental institution and get help. Wow. Okay! I mean, at least I will be talking to humans & not wild things.

Hmm, now that's not a message people want to hear. I thought maybe, someone will message:
"Hey, I realised, your acct is deactivated. Is everything okay? I hope you are." or something.

BUT NOOOOO! I get a message like 'that'.

So, I called her up & told her: The world doesn't revolve around you. You need to realize, some things aren't always about you when it comes to my personal life and you are not deleted. I deactivated my acct, because my life is overwhelming. 

I reactivated my acct and she started making jokes about it. I forgave her again.

The third time. I made a joke & she got abusive telling me: whatever. Dont talk to me. I dont care about you if you go ahead & kill yourself, because you've always wanted to die & no one really cares. 

I mean, yeah, I have always wanted to die, because Im sick of life. However, the last message I sent her was 'nothing like that'. It was more about my book. Sure, I hate my life, because it's a jigsaw puzzle, but I don't plan on dying.

I told her this though: 

"There is a difference when someone wishes death upon themselves, compared to when a friend wishes death upon them. I never appreciate or accept anyone to speak to me the way you have spoken to me."

She apologised, but I dont think I want to apologise. Im over forgiving people. I've been hurt so many times & I don't know how to find within myself the forgiveness for people. 

However here is a note for people who think it's okay to diagnose people incorrectly: Please don't misdiagnose others. Get your Psych Degree before diagnosing anyone incorrectly. Think what you say to people, before you make any comments. And please do get the help you need.

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