ROdown Blog
Workplace bullying it's not ok!
I thought I knew what bullying was having dealt with racial remarks and comments and witnessing others pushed around.
But what happens when you start work, and you’re not sure if you’re being bullied? I have always experienced positive relationships with my colleagues, however when I changed positions within the same organisation, it was like somebody had flicked a switch.
There was no longer the joking conversation with my new supervisor – in its place were whispered discussions with other staff, often standing behind me while I worked. They would make the odd comment about how I chose to complete a task and make snide comments masked in niceness.
I would be told a deadline could be stretched a couple of days and then those same person would then tell others I couldn’t reach deadlines. A bad probation report would sent to higher management without discussion.
I was aware that my supervisor was particularly vocal about believing I should never have been given the job. I went home many nights frustrated and confused, in tears, and many mornings dreading going to work. I even had a discussion with my supervisor about the way I was treated and the reasons for it, and yet nothing changed.
Despite my determination to continue without involving anyone else, I was eventually pulled aside by our manager, who told me others had reported I was being given a hard time. Even then, my first instinct was to deny it, but there was no doubt that I was being bullied in the workplace. With the assistance of my manager, the situation was able to be very quickly resolved. Unfortunately many people still struggle every day with rude remarks, unrealistic deadlines and unfair comparisons, not knowing whether their discomfort is justified and remaining silent.
The Australian Human Rights Commission Fact Sheet gives one definition of workplace bullying: “the repeated less favourable treatment of a person by another or others in the workplace, which may be considered unreasonable and inappropriate workplace practice. It includes behaviour that intimidates, offends, degrades or humiliates a worker."
If you are unsure of whether you are being bullied, but a colleague’s behaviour is making you feel uncomfortable, there are a number of things you can do:
• If you feel that the way somebody is treating you is not right, it probably isn’t. Trust your instincts about what is professional behaviour and how you should be treated.
• Talk to your supervisor, manager, Harassment Officer (if your workplace has one), Human Resources or Union, if you are a member.
• If this fails, speak to someone outside of your organisation. See ReachOut factsheets
• Many organisations also have access to free counselling services – make sure you know who they are if this is the case and talk to them.
• Talking to parents and friends might also help you put things into perspective.
Don’t stand for workplace bullying. If you see that a colleague is distressed or being treated unfairly, have a chat to them, the bully (if you feel comfortable doing so), or tell a supervisor. You could be the one that helps to end a bad situation for somebody!
What would you do if you suspected someone in your workplace was being bullied?
Email this page
Not a member?
Join Reach Out to access a range of great member features.
Forgot your password?
13 Comments
Log in to join the conversation. Join Reach Out.
DarwinLoz
6 months ago
Reply ReportHi hmmm, thanks for sharing your experience and I'm sorry that it has happened to you. I'm also glad that the comments on this piece have helped you to know that you're not alone. My experience was also that it was incredibly hard to acknowledge that it was happening. However I'm glad that others are around to help support you. Hope you check out the other info and best of luck for your future endeavours!!
DarwinLoz
6 months ago
Reply ReportHi hmmm, thanks for sharing your experience and I'm sorry that it has happened to you. I'm also glad that the comments on this piece have helped you to know that you're not alone. My experience was also that it was incredibly hard to acknowledge that it was happening. However I'm glad that others are around to help support you. Hope you check out the other info and best of luck for your future endeavours!!
Sophie RO crew
6 months ago
Reply ReportThanks for sharing your experience hmmm... and it's great to hear that posting here and reading about others has helped you. There is also lots of information on our factsheet here.
hmmm...
6 months ago
Reply ReportI am currently understanding and coming to terms with how difficult it is to actually admit to being bullied in the workplace... I am a sensible hard working & positive person with a wealth of experience in my field..and yet in such a very short space in time i feel like my whole world has been tipped upside down by a 'new' person in HR. The irony is mind boggling... The bullying is insidious, subtle and oddly very much noticed by others - it is embarressing, disabling and leaves me feeling desperately inadequate and completely hopeless to finding a resolution. My manager is lovely person who is aware and has observed the same for herself with reports from others of a similar nature...yet after having meetings to 'air grievences' nothing is resolved - in fact the audasity of the bully is to infact play the role of the 'victim'to some degree as i am seeing it & subtley belittling others in the process... i cannot believe how quickly things can change in the workplace... my head is still spinning from the experience & lack of resolution to a very public and yet a very private experience! I have decided to resign to save my health from further stress - i am left feeling confused, anxious & desperatly inadequate. I know I am none of these things in reality. I will move on to bigger & better things - reading the notes from others today has been incredible helpful to me. I am glad to have found this kind of support - talking about my situation makes me very feel sad & words often escape me - I can see how easily it is to fall into a state of depression...sharing my experience here feels good.
Roisin - RO Crew
about 1 year ago
Reply ReportHi there sicofit,
sicofit
about 1 year ago
Reply ReportUPdate
I have now been threatened by the deputy commissioner of qld corrective services threatening me that my behaviour better change, my behaviour!!...This is a corrupt government department and I have also received a letter from the unethical standards corrupt unit saying that they performed all their actions correct. You are all a bunch of corrupt liars. You think its funny when a woman is bullied!...what manager in a government department laughs at a woman when she said she was bullied, what HR manager thinks he will make a fool of a woman and threaten her she will never work again, what unit called the ethical standards unit laughs at a woman when she writes to anyone who will listen about how she was treated and no one was stopping it...This is the Qld Corrective Service backed by the Qld Police service bullies as well. All a bunch of corrupt bullies, who think its funny to harras me and laugh at me because I cried and was offended by being humiliated and assaulted. Keep on laughing when I kill myself hope you feel good about yourself then!!.....are you going to laugh at my funeral bullies...tell your wives what you have been doing to me.....big tough men....and I have met so many others this has happened to....
sicofit
about 1 year ago
Reply ReportYes I am a member of a union, I will end up seeing soon what they are capable of.
We don't have ANY rights in the workplace at all!
I have had everything done to me that constitutes harassment, from being screamed at, set up to fail, assaulted everything, and it has all been unsubstantiated, downplayed and put back on me by the deputy commissioner to say I didn't do anything to help myself and I contributed to my problem!!
Its a joke, I am scared to go any where else to work knowing what I know and believe, that I can not stop it once your targetted. I believe that I would have ended up being raped had I not burst into tears and walked out to my doctor. And I know for a fact nothing would have been done, I work in an environment where there are cameras on us all the time and had an incident when I burst into tears as I had chest pain and everyone was standing laughing at me, and I was told if I wanted to do that (meaning cry) to go out the back and do it.When I made a complaint that noone helped me and stood laughing at me when I had chest pain and crying the (un)ethical corrupt standards unit said that that was reasonable management practice, but had I fallen on the ground and no one helped me then that would have been wrong.
It wouldn't matter what I said, they cut me down to make a fool of me, they had an answer for everything even if it was a ridiculous answer to my concerns. Who tells a woman when she was assaulted at work by this bully supervisor that she could tell her doctor anything, undermining me and my doctor as well. This was the so called ETHICAL STANDARDS UNIT.....
Its because I am a woman and they are all MEN, its a little boys club and a complete joke.
DarwinLoz
about 1 year ago
Reply ReportSicofit, I am very sorry that this has happened to you. Are you a member of a Union? If so you should have a chat to them or check out the linked ReachOut fact sheet for some more info on other places you could approach. No one should make you feel that way. Stay strong and check out some of the other fact sheets on this topic.
sicofit
about 1 year ago
Reply ReportI have been bullied and realise we do not have any rights in the work place. I was not protected in a government department with their so called bullying laws. I was assaulted twice and bullied over a 3 year period, when I finally reported it after the last assault as i thought finally I have witnesses who have seen it, I was laughed at by the manager until he realised there were witnesses. My complaints ended up being unsubstantiated and I was bullied by the (un)ethical standard (corrupt) unit who did the investigation and was told I could tell my doctor anything. I was accused of having a psychological or psychiatric illness because I was behaving inappropriately (I cried when I was last bullied) and was taking excessive sick leave and a list of other lies to have me sent to a psych under the public sector act once they had labeled me a whistleblower because I had made a public interest disclosure in reporting the assaults. Mind you they used those complaints I had made of assaults then against me as part of the list of lies and exaggerations to justify I had a mental illness. I was also threatened by the HR manager that I will never work again when they send me to their psych. I am distraught at the prospect of what they have done to me and that I need to support myself and my daughter. I have been stood down for a while now on full pay while they work out how they are going to destroy me and my daughters life. I am an older single mother and I burst into tears and cant stop crying so much now because of the lies said about me and the fact I hadnt been able to protect myself then and I still cannot protect myself from their lies. I constantly think the only answer is to kill myself because I could never go through what has been done to me again. To me and all those who have seen what was done to me, know that because I am no one with no qualifications in a job with the majority being men I have no rights. Supervisors and above have been able to say and write a heap of lies about me and I have never been given natural justice to answer any of them, no one is interested in what i have to say, they are only interested in proving I am mental to get rid of me.....how dare they push me that far that the only answer I can see is to jump of a cliff.............
Snuffle nose
over 1 year ago
Reply ReportI had it haven once and the dirty so and so got away with it!!!!! But with my second one I carried a note book and every time he said something to bully me I'd note it down in the book.
When I had enough information and evidence of his unfair actions towards me in general, I wrote e-mails to carriage manager and safety committee. and they went by the state and federal laws and hauled him through the coals.....
The head committee .told him if he was caught or reported to be bullying anyone again he would have his membership revoked. As I found out this person had a background of bullying other people around as well! After that Ultimatum, he stays away from me now ........I been though it once, and I do not want go thought the whole ordeal ever again!
delicatedreamer
over 1 year ago
Reply ReportThis was my experience with workplace bullying also, the person doing it was very well-liked amongst senior staff and the owners, and was a a senior staff member herself. I felt that if I spoke up the behaviour would get worse, or people wouldn't believe me. On some occasions she would be really nice to me but then next minute she'd be all cold and nasty so I was very confused about where I stood with her. Some of the bullying was quite subtle and easy to conceal so it was hard for me to determine whether it was bullying or not at times. I often came home from work, and left for work in tears. She complained about me to anyone who would listen and I ended up being let go from the workplace. I often wonder if her complaints had anything to do with how my employment ended. It has made me very scared to get another job, but this fact sheet has made me feel a little bit better about it :)
If I suspected someone in my workplace was getting bullied in the future I would have a chat to them about it and see if they were okay, and if offer to support them in taking things to the manager.
DarwinLoz
over 1 year ago
Reply ReportIn my situation I found that the bully too was very popular. Part of my confusion came from the fact that prior to working under this individual, we got along really well. It was difficult to deal with because everyone was friends, including to the extent that some people hung out after work - it still doesn't detract from the fact that your managers should recognise unfair treatment.
Vicky
over 1 year ago
Reply ReportIt is very difficult to tackle workplace bully. A lot of bullies are popular and the favourite of the management. They know to build up the net work , and such is human nature that most people feel previledged to be part of the net work and not being targeted , to make it worse , they feel they need to contribute to bullying to remain in the net work . They make sure the target feel the hostility but not obvious enough  to confront them . If you confront , they would say they are not talking about you and you are only too sentive . They  make everyone commit the crime so it is in everyone's benefit to protect the net work .  I would like to know how to tackle this kind of bullies when they have the managers as their "friends" and collegues as their "mates ".Â
Â