Becoming a parent

What does this mean for me?

Having a baby in your world means making changes to your life. These can be wonderful and rewarding, as well as drastic and difficult. As a parent, you tend to be spending more time at home with your baby and less with your friends. Financially, having a baby to feed and clothe may strain your budget and mean giving up things you want. This may be tough and so it's important to work through any concerns and get support for yourself and your baby.

Looking after yourself as a new parent

As a parent you may be focused on looking after your baby and sometimes this means that you don't look after yourself. It's important to take care of yourself physically as well as emotionally. Having support may help you balance your needs with the needs of your child. Speaking to a community health nurse at your nearest community health centre or early childhood centre may be helpful. You can also talk to your doctor, a counsellor or family support worker who can also help you work out how best to do this.

Parenthood often keeps you 'on your toes' with things to learn and lots of changes happening in your life. The trick is to cope with these without feeling like you are burning out. Eating well, getting regular exercise, relaxing and talking through problems all help you stay healthy and in control. You may want to check out the fact sheets about eating well and being active for more information. It is also a good idea to talk with your doctor or other health professionals about the best levels of activity and foods for you.

Make an effort to keep all your early childhood health appointments

Early Childhood Health Centres help you give your baby the best care. They keep a record of your baby's development and health. They also offer a great chance to ask questions, get advice, and find out about support options. Your midwife or postnatal nurse may also be a good person to talk to if you need support. It is OK to ring the Early Childhood Health Centre and ask questions or to make an appointment between your scheduled appointments if you feel you need to. Your midwife, postnatal nurse or community health centre should be able to let you know where your nearest Early Childhood Health Centre is. The white pages should also list Early Childhood Centres.

Talk to someone

If you are finding things are tough, having a chat to someone you trust may help you work through your feelings. If you have a partner, you may want to talk and share your feelings with each other in safe and supportive ways. Learning how you might be able to support each other at this time can be really important for both of you. It's often helpful to have support from someone who has experienced parenthood. This may be someone like your mum or dad, carer or guardian, older siblings or grandparents. Other suggestions for people to talk to may be a friend, doctor or counsellor and community health centres.

Somewhere to call home

Having somewhere to call home may be an important part of feeling secure in your new role as a parent. Home can mean anything from a bedroom in supported accommodation to your own house. Centrelink should be able to provide you with information to help get you settled. Check out the Centrelink fact sheet for more information about Centrelink.

Do things you enjoy, even if you're at home

There can be times when you have to stay at home when you would rather be out. This may be hard. Having time to do things you enjoy may help you feel better about yourself and your new parenting role. Some ideas could be to invite friends round, listen to music, cook a nice meal, or chill out and relax for a while. Check out the fact sheet on Relaxation for ideas for chilling out.

Take time out from being the parent once in a while

It is OK to leave your baby with someone you trust so that you can have some time to yourself. You may want to ask your partner, parents, siblings, friends or neighbours to baby sit for a while. It is a good idea to be sure that you ask a person whom you can trust and feel safe leaving your baby with. Whilst you have time for yourself, you may want to take time out to do some shopping, see a film or catch up with friends.

Get lots of rest

Sometimes having a child can mean your sleep patterns become irregular. Babies often need your attention at times when you would like to rest or sleep. It is important that you try to get some rest at times when your baby is also sleeping so that you can catch up on lost sleep for yourself.

Have fun times with your baby

There are lots of great things you can do with your child where the two of you get to enjoy each others company. Some ideas may be to:

• Attend baby swimming classes.
• Borrow toys from the local toy library.
• Play at the local playground.
• Walk along the beach or at the park.
• Draw/paint and be creative.
• Join an early parents group.
• Join mum and bub yoga classes.

Join a local support or parents group

Joining a support group can be a good way to meet other people in your situation. It may be a place where you can get some support, your child can mix with other children and a social activity which may help you feel active. Your Early Childhood Centre, Local Council or doctor should be able to help you with what is available in your area.

Getting help

There may be times when being a parent can get you down. If you feel like things are getting on top of you, it may be helpful to talk with someone like a counsellor, your local doctor or someone else whom you can trust. They should be able to help you manage being a parent. Check out the Who can help you section for more information about how these people may be able to help. Your local phone book should have details for a counsellor in your local area.

More Information

FP NSW Healthline - 1300 65 88 86.

Parent Line - NSW (Advice for parents with kids up to the age of 18 years, 9am -4.30 Mon- Sat )- 13 20 55 

Parent Line QLD/NT (8am - 10pm 7 days a week) - 1300 30 1300

Parentl Line VIC (8am - 12am Mon - Fri and 10am - 10pm weekends) - 13 22 89

Parent Line SA (24 hours, 7 days a week) - 1300 364 100

Parent Line WA ( 24 hours, 7 days a week) - 08 9272 1466 or 1800 654 432

Parent Line ACT - 02 6287 3833

Parent Line TAS - 1300 808 178

Family Support Services Association (Support for families experiencing stress) - 02 6292 9999

Tresillian (Support and phone counselling) - 02 9787 0855 or 1800 637 357 

Early Childhood Centres - Look under "E" in the White pages for your nearest Branch.