Body image: Love the skin you're in

That's such a good point jackamabob, when we think of our friends we don't think of them in terms of their appearance, we think about the things we value about them: that they kind, caring, funny, honest, etc... These things are way more important than how we look! It's a really great idea to let people know the things we like & value about them, to help keep reminding people that appearance is not the most important thing :)

well, Describe yourself - Without a single word to your physique, say good things about yourself. Try to describe your friends without how they look. Think of the good parts of them. When you come up with something, tell them! It will make their day all the better and we can never underestimate the power of our words

I see what you're saying Mara May, but I think we can fall into a trap of thinking that we need the love and approval of a boyfriend/girlfriend to feel good about ourselves.  Following on from MusicalLibran, healthy body image is about acceptive yourself regardless of what others think.  It's so liberating and empowering to realise that you don't need to rely on others to know that you are pefect just the way you are - flaws and all.  You don't have to love your perceived flaws but you can acknowledge and appreciate that they make you who you are...and that person is pretty darn good!

I've always hated the way I look. Everything about it annoys me somewhat. I do know that, All of the models and actors are insanely beautiful & airbrushed. But, going to an all girls' school, I was constantly surrounded by people thinner & prettier than me, and everyone constantly obsessed over their image.

What MusicalLibran said is true though. Stupid as it sounds, getting a boyfriend was insanely helpful. Being loved, for me and not for what I looked like was amazing. And, the fact that he did also like what I looked like was a massive self esteem boost. His hugs really made me see that, if someone else could love me, I could too.

I've struggled with my body image too - which led to a viscious cycle of yo-yo dieting, weight gain, more dieting ...until finally I had weight loss surgery and lost 50kg.  In trying to deal with how I then felt about the inevitable loose skin....I went left of field.  Instead of more surgery - I got serious about trying to accept my body.

I started getting regular massages with someone who gently insisted that he be allowed to touch and massage all the bits of me that I despise - especially that loose wobbly tum.

It's non sexual. It's just relaxing and accepting - and in the six months since starting to have these massages regularly - I've really shifted how I actually feel about my body. The attention and acceptance given to me through the massage has shifted my feelings more than trying to be disciplined and positive in my thinking ever did.

(I always GOT it intellectually that I should have acceptance - but it never translated to how I felt). 

I can't say strongly enough - touch and be touched. Let your skin and muscles accept the message that you are worthy and beautiful as you are, even when your mind doesn't.  I think I might not have struggled so badly with weight and body issues if I'd allowed myself this when I was much younger.

Hello

I have had struggles with my body image and the way I look, short and stocky. I had professional Drs. say to my face that I am fat, but he did not measure my BMI and muscle and fat content or weigh me even!

I got so cheesed off to the point I rolled up my sleeve and snared," I work out with weight to keep my body fit and strong, now you at this arm and tell me if it's fat or not!"

I tensed the muscles in my forearm whist asking him to tell me if I was fat or not. People don't have go through this filth,but it happens I am afraid.

The Dr must of thought I was gonna thump him! Well it seems the norm to ridicule anyone who's fat, too skinny or more or less different and stick out like a sore thumb! Hate that stereotype as many people put though hell though their because of something that they couldn't be helped !

Positivity I think is the key.
If people didn't have social pressure to be "normal", as in super thin, etc. then how awesome would the world be? So much more smiling face and happier days. I believe that it is important to be healthy but there's a point when healthy becomes unhealthy at either side of the scale. Balance is needed. :)
With body images it can feel impossible to get that skinny but is it right for you? Do you need to be that thin? Would health complications result if you were that skinny, seeing as you'd most probably lacking nutrients?
Being happy and healthy is all that matters, no one is required to conform to fit in to society. Just be yourself. :)

Hi Gina-Bernadette :)

Body image is your attitude towards your body, and how you see yourself. So negative or unhealthy body image is when your attitude towards your body is negative.

In terms of distortion - thinking you are different to what you actually are - I guess it is going to be hard to rely on yourself to know this if the way you see your body is distorted!

If you are concerned you the way you see yourself may be distorted, it may be good to talk to someone about it. Check out the suggestions for how to get help in the body dysmorphic disorder fact sheet - listed on the left side of this page in the related links section.

Regardless of whether or not the way you see your body is distorted, you can improve the way you see yourself - both in terms of the physical and the way you think about yourself in general.

Check out the tips in this fact sheet and the self-esteem fact sheet self-esteem fact sheet - listed on the left side of this page in the related links section - for more tips on how to do this!

im not sure if i have distorted body image - how can you tell?

If you feel comfortable in your own skin and feel good within yourself - then you have healthy body image.

Not many people ever feel like they 100% love every bit of their bodies, but it's when that starts to impact on the way you feel about yourself (self-image) that it's a problem and that you might need to learn to become better friends with yourself.

The self-esteem fact sheets (links on the left) might be helpful.

The body dysmorphic disorder fact sheet might also be helpful :)

I sometimes wonder how can you tell if the view of your own body is distorted? In another words, how can you tell if you got unhealthy body image? Does it involve checking your BMI and asking for professional opinion?

I think body image is such an important issue that has widespread effects on so many people. I think part of the reason is that it is such a systemic issue - by that I mean its not just something that people feel and others might disagree. Its something that is promoted in many levels of society, by the media (even government advertising targeting health), by families, by peers and in individuals. I think for me my aim is not to have perfect body image (or think, omg I'm so hot!) but more about a balanced approach in which I work towards feeling healthy (physically) but also changing my perspectives and perceptions to be more compassionate and accepting towards myself!