Fine tune your social skills

Moving into a completely new town and meeting a new set of people is never going to be easy. You can feel like you’re starting your entire life from scratch and that you are never going to fit in or make new friends.

Being in a new environment can kick your self-confidence for six.

Challenge negative self-talk which can paralyse you by:

• Reality test: What is my evidence for and against my thinking? Are my thoughts factual, or are they just my interpretations?
• Look for alternative explanations: Are there any other ways that I could look at this situation? What else could this mean?
• Put it into perspective: Is this situation as bad as I am making out to be? What is the worst thing that could happen? How likely is it?
• Use goal directed thinking: Is thinking this way helping me to feel good or to achieve my goals? What can I do that will help me solve the problem?
• Set realistic short-term (day or hour) and long-term goals (weeks or months): feeling overwhelmed makes it harder to keep things in perspective and can paralyse you, making it harder to take action.
• Say yes to invitations to go out: like the invitation from Chris. Social situations get easier with practice. You don’t have to stay for hours – give yourself, say 1 hour, then see how you feel.

Keep playing ROC for tips on how to feel comfortable at the party.