I think this relationship is off track

Something is not quite right

Having a relationship can be a great experience but maintaining a relationship may not always be easy. The beginning of a relationship can be romantic and everything may seem perfect. Romantic love may be exciting and you may feel that you have found 'the one'.

There may also be times when you feel that your relationship has a few problems. It might still feel ok and you can work things out even though things can seem tough at the time.

You may feel as though you love someone and the other person is not ready or prepared to commit to this relationship at this stage. You may know that this relationship is not working and you may feel the need to end it.

Check out the fact sheet on Assessing a relationship for more information.

Changes in a relationship

Two people meet, are attracted to each other, and fall in love for a whole range of reasons. Sometimes though relationships change over time for just as many reasons. When changes happen in a relationship, we might have a lot of feelings, depending on whether the changes are what we expect or want to happen.

A relationship might feel like it is not going the way we were hoping or planning.

Two people in a relationship might question whether the relationship can continue for these, and other, reasons:

• You might feel you have different ideas about what you both want from a relationship. 
• Your plans might change in the future.
• You might question your personal safety in the relationship.
• Things might change for you and might make it difficult for you to continue a relationship.
• You may feel as though your needs or expectations may not be met in the relationship.
• Do I want to be in a relationship?

All relationships go through changes. Sometimes you might question whether you want to be in this relationship or not. It might help to ask yourself:

• Do I feel safe physically, emotionally, socially and spiritually in this relationship?
• Are my needs listened to and met?
• Are we listening to and meeting one another's needs?
• Am I being respected and do we treat one another with respect?
• Can we listen to and respect one another's thoughts and ideas?
• Can we communicate openly and honestly with one another?

Acknowledgements

The information provided here is based on "An Intergalactic Guide to Relationships", a project initiated by Central Coast Health.

Thanks to FPA Health for helping edit this factsheet.