School holidays are possibly my least favourite time of year. I need social interaction to function and my mood gets really low when I don’t have constant connection. I don’t want to arrange plans because then I feel like a burden. I know my friends don’t want to hang out with me every second of every day. 😞

celebrating my birthday was a good break from uni dread... but now I have to get back into hating uni againthe need to go to networking events to maximise my chances of an internship is so overstimulating, on top of midsemester tests and obviously the copious amounts of content. how long is settling into uni meant to take? we're pretty much at the halfway mark.

Oh great, there's gonna be another 26-30 degree celsius season starting from tomorrow onwards judging by the looks of the temperatures for each of the days on the weather app, even though we're already on autumn and we're literally 2 months away from starting winter. 🙄honestly im just worried that that means I won't be able to workout at the gym thats in my current student accomodation within the next week or so because of this.also, working out during the hot temperature is definitely a NO NO because I do need to take proper care of my skin from all the sweat and the sun exposure. the gym in my student accomodation unfortunately is small (size wise) and has a large gym window (with no blinds or curtains😑) that makes you become easily exposed to the sun/UV rays. I can only go there whenever the UV index is low but not when it's medium or high.I've already had to do the same within these past few months (having to take like a week off from the gym or so because of the hot temperature), though I was able to go there during the early mornings a few times and then during the evenings a few times as well throughout these whole few months.having said that I actually hate going to the gym (but I have to do it anyway cause its a necessity) 🤣, and I just wish I had my own gym equipment (I'm talking more about the workout machines since I already have dumbbells) that I can use and rely at home instead of going to an actual place to do them.I'm gonna be relocating to another accomodation this upcoming June so thats good cause at least they dont have a gym in that student accomodation, but they do have a gym thats nearby and I bet that that gym is gonna be large in size and not small. large means that theres more room and theres spaces for you to avoid having to be infront of the gym window.

Hi everyone,I'm feeling a bit lost in my relationship right now.I could give you ALL the backstory but, to be honest, it would be a novel. So I'm just going to keep this simple and to this singular incident with some minor, more relevant backstory. I really genuinely can't tell if I'm overreacting or not, I don't know what to think, so any thoughts or shared experiences would be appreciated💜I've asked my partner about five times if he can plan a date for us (because I often plan everything we do and all our dates, and it's just this feeling of wanting your partner to think about you and plan something nice for you instead). The prior four times it has been an absolute disaster where basically he's said that he's planned something and then the day comes and it turns out that he hasn't, or I've had to keep reminding him to do it. I know that if you don't ask, you don't get, but I feel like I'm constantly nagging for him to do things that I've said would be important to me and I've made my desires more than clear. My partner thinks he has ADHD (but he's undiagnosed at the moment) which is why he procrastinates everything, but it's really starting to hurt because I've been so so patient and given him so many chances.Anyways I have a list in my notes app of things I want to do/places I want to go in my city. I figured I would give that to him so that there would be no way that he couldn't plan something. He would literally just have to pick things I've already thought of and surprise me with what he's chosen. Even though it was meant to be a surprise, he told me what we were doing the day before which felt disappointing. But the worst part is that for dinner he chose a place off my list that wasn't even open that night plus you needed a reservation (which you can't get if it's shut). I felt like he didn't do any more research than just picking stuff off the list, because imagine we rocked up and the place was shut (or even if it was open he didn't book in advance) - it would've been another disaster like the previous four times I've had to ask for a date. We got into a bit of a fight (a more intense fight than normal) and he ended up picking another place to go for dinner that was walk-in and open. The date went alright but I still couldn't help but feel disappointed. I don't know. I put so much thought and planning into the outings and dates that I organise (weekly), and I feel like I wish I could get the same treatment just once without something going wrong or having to constantly remind him. It doesn't make me feel special or valued, or even desired, at all.My parents are going away to the UK for a few weeks in late May. I invited him to stay at my place for a week because the house will be all mine and he has roommates so we're never truly alone at his (though to be honest I wish he would stay longer than a week, and I've expressed as much) just to see if anything would be different if we lived together. Plus I can't go too far because there's no one else to look after my cat except me while they're away. I'm not sure if this would help or not, I'm not sure if he would put in any more effort into these sorts of things if we lived together, I don't even know if it's relevant at all or what I'm doing or trying to achieve here. I. Just. Don't. Know. Am I wasting my time here?Anyways thanks for reading lovely OC members, as always, sorry this post is so longggg💜

This might get wordy sorry!For context I'm someone who is about a year into trying to get ADHD diagnosis and medication (nearly there, i hope), but had been considering it in a serious capacity for about 5 years even before that. I'm also technically a first-year in uni, but already I've had to switch degrees since last year. I thought it was because I didn't gel with the subject area (that and struggling with the coursework) but now that I'm in a new degree that suits my passions far more I'm still coming up on the issue of not being able to just Do anything. I still don't have a job (kind of - I landed one briefly and then soon after got dismissed for a screwup.)Spoiler (Highlight to read)I didn't deal very well with this and had some self-harm thoughts for a few days. it was scary to realise it really can happen to anyone, even if you never thought you would, or would want to, harm yourself. i'm doing better nowI didn't deal very well with this and had some self-harm thoughts for a few days. it was scary to realise it really can happen to anyone, even if you never thought you would, or would want to, harm yourself. i'm doing better nowMy executive function is so beyond cooked. I think if I didn't have my family around and people to disappoint, I simply would not Do Anything. I want/need my family to think i'm doing well with my coursework and general life stuff just so they don't start freaking out. I wish I could be comfortable enough to express when i'm having difficulty but I always want to take it on myself to fix it. If they didn't exist, or if I had moved out by now, I don't think I would have the drive or respect for myself to even get up and eat or drink, or move from a single spot, let alone send out job applications daily or attend classes. and yet i have friends and family who deal with 30+ hour jobs on top of full-time uni and life issues who are such sweet and strong and kind people and i do not know how they do it all while hardly breaking a sweat. (I know everyone struggles, including them, I just wonder why I break down over the smallest things)Comparatively I have it so cruisy and yet for some reason I just can't deal with the simplest of everyday pressures and it makes me feel weak, incompetent, useless. Historically I haven't ever really thought of myself as experiencing depression and I don't love to think about it too hard, but on my worst days I wish I kind of weren't here, and then I remember how much more difficult every person in my life has it and it makes me feel worse and weaker.Anyway I'm holding out on getting medicated!! Looking forward to hopefully being able to just Do things if I want/need to do them.!!! (disclaimer- i have no suicidal intent. also have no self-harming intent at this time and have sought help in past instances where i did)